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Tuesday, January 24, 2006



Thanks for making that distinction. I wasn't thinking about it that way, but of course it's not fair and does make a big leap...

Lisa V

Yes, I tried to make that point in my post. I've decided I will probably have little effect in adoption reform, but if I can educate the masses, even just a few of them then I will feel better.


Ugh. I tried to start reading, and just couldn't continue. I just don't go to those places anymore. I admire women like you and others who have the energy to attempt to educate people one-to-one.


Good point, Kateri -- I'm sorry about that.

Ms. Mom

You're an awesome woman. I cannot handle those who do not recognize that a woman is not a birthmother until those papers are signed. Ah, there's the anger again. Seething.


I must admit, a little over a year ago I made the mistake of calling an expectant mother a birth mother, before she'd even had a chance to truly make her decision of whether or not to place her baby (after the baby was born). My mistake was made not out of arrogance, rather out of ignorance. I was new to the adoption arena and simply had no idea how insensitive I was being.

Another member of the forum I was posting on kindly sent me a PM and corrected me, explaining why. I really appreciated that and I'm careful not to make that mistake again.

I've learned a lot, as a fairly new adoptive mother (our son is 13 months old now), from the forums and now from these blogs.

I thank all of you for helping to educate me and, hopefully, to making me more sensitive to the feelings of expectant mothers and birth/first mothers. Voicing your thoughts, feelings, and opinions IS making a difference to some of us!


Lollerskates. I totally read that entry after it was posted and was tempted to post a comment in reply to the entry but then thought better. It was bad enough that I fell sucker to reading the comments on the booju-mooju debate community on livejournal about the anti-adoption movement. Thank goodness I'm a wallflower for the most part and don't feel compelled to read comment threads everywhere. ;o)


Hey Kateri... you've inspired me to take my own public stand on the matter... I might get lambasted for it... but it's worth it if it makes one person think.

Crazy Mom

Thanks to your blog, as well as that of other mothers who chose adoption, I will NEVER refer to my daughter's mother as her BIRTH mother...or any other woman, for that matter. Thank you for showing me how this affects people. I would have NEVER realized it on my own.


hi...i just wanted to say thanks for your blog...i was adopted 18 years ago and for a long time i've had bad negative feelings toward my birth mother...but now i believe i understand a little bit more...i am also doing a paper for my college writing class on adoption...your thoughts and opinions have helped a lot...so thank you and have a wonderful day! ~Julie

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